The Final Exam

A few fraternity brothers needed to fill a science requirement in order to graduate, so they spent weeks studying for the final.

The day of the exam arrived, and they were more than ready for the test. The teacher pulled out a chart that had different pictures of birds' legs.

The teacher said, "This is your exam. Name these birds by their legs."

After ten minutes one boy stood up, absolutely furious, and slammed the paper down on the teacher's desk.

"Unbelievable!" he yelled. "You knew I needed to pass this exam to graduate. How could you do this to me?"

The guy began to leave the room and the teacher yelled at him, "Hey you, what's your name?"

The student pulled up his pants, revealing his legs, and said, "I don't know, sir. You tell me."

Job Opening

I went on a job interview the other day. Now I'm not really looking for another job, but it doesn't hurt to see what's out there. I saw a great one in the paper with much higher pay then what I was getting. However, I wasn't really qualified but I decided to apply anyway. A week later, I became very excited when I was called in for an interview.

Realizing that I didn't submit a resume when I filled out the application, I brought a copy with me to the interview. My prospective employer asked a few questions then read through my resume. After a few anxious moments as I sat in silence waiting for him to finish reading, he put down my resume.

He looked up at me and said, "We have an opening for someone like you."

"Really?" I replied excitedly. "What is it?"

"It's called the door!"

Racism Today?

Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream 'racism' these days... ever wonder why? A customer walks into an establishment and asks, "In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?" The clerk looks at him and says, "Are you Polish?"

The guy (clearly offended) says, "Well, yes I am. But let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German? Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish? Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican? If I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?"

The clerk says, "Well, no, I probably wouldn't!"

With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says, "Well then, why did you ask me if I'm Polish because I asked for Polish sausage?"

The clerk replied, "Because you're in Home Depot."