Chucking A Sickie

Negotiations between union members and their employer were at an impasse. The union denied that their workers were flagrantly abusing their contract's sick-leave provisions.

      

One morning at the bargaining table, the company's chief negotiator held aloft the morning edition of the newspaper, "This man," he announced, "called in sick yesterday!"

      

There on the sports page, was a photo of the supposedly ill employee, who had just won a local golf tournament with an excellent score.

      

The silence in the room was broken by a union negotiator. "Wow," he said. "Just think of what kind of score he could have had if he hadn't been sick!"

Proposing At A Football Match

A university student took his new girlfriend to a footy match. They found seats at the MCG and were watching the action. As the full forward was lining up for goal, the boy said to his girlfriend, "Take a good look at that fellow. I expect him to be our best man next year."

      

His girlfriend snuggled closer to him and said, "That's the strangest way I ever heard of for a boy to propose to a girl. But, regardless of how you said it, I accept!"

Why hit the blanket?

A wife comes home late one night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From under the blanket, she sees four legs instead of just her husband's two. She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can. Once she's done, she goes to the kitchen to have a drink. As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine. He says, "Hi darling, your parents have come to visit us, so I let them stay in our bedroom. Did you say hello?"