Garden Of Eden

A Briton, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking nude in the Garden of Eden. 
       
"Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British." 


"Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They're naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French." 


"No clothes, no shelter," the Russian points out, "they have only an apple to eat, and they're being told this is paradise. They are definitely Russian."

America's Smartest President

An airplane was about to crash. There were 4 passengers on board, but only 3 parachutes.
The 1st passenger said, "I am Lionel Messi, the best footballer in the world. My millions of fans need me, and I can't afford to die." So he took the 1st pack and left the plane.
The 2nd passenger, Donald Trump, said, "I am the newly-elected U.S. President, and I am the smartest President in American history, so my people don't want me to die." He took the 2nd pack and jumped out of the plane.
The 3rd passenger, the Pope, said to the 4th passenger, a 10 year old schoolboy, "My son, I am old and don't have many years left, you have more years ahead so I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute."
The little boy said, "That's okay, Your Holiness, there's a parachute left for you. America's smartest President took my schoolbag."